It
is certainly true that rewarding the child is most appropriate way for
their encouragement. If a child is learning how to walk on her own
and when she falls on her first try, she will look at you for your
response. It is absolutely most exciting moment for the parents, so
child gets motivated to stand up from the ground to impress
their parents. However, if parents discourage for their failure, the child will
become discouraged and eventually that will affect badly on the child attitude. In the same way, it will apply to teenagers and adults too.
Whereas,
behavior of parents changes as the child grows. They start expecting a
lot from their child, which may give more pressure on the child’s
psychology. We do not say our child that none is perfect in this world.
We never say that’s okay: there is nothing wrong on your capability but
you should not give up trying. Every child is different individual with
different brain and emotions. It is most essential to give enough time
to make everything right. Helping a child for everything may spoil the
child and their dependency. If we give a book to a child with tough
vocabulary and if we ask them to read, then it can be overwhelming to a
child and he/she may loose his/her interest on reading afterwards.
Instead, if we provide them a paper with simple words, then they will
find it interesting and feel confidence onwards. Not only that, they
will also develop the positive feeling toward study by mastering their
capability.
In
contrast, when a teenager did a mistake in their life that could be
disastrous for them. This is not because of results of what they just
did, but this is because they are afraid to share with their parents and
thinking about their reaction. How can not we accept that they will
learn from their own experiences? Definitely, it is our duty to protect
the child and prevent them from choosing a wrong track of life. Nonetheless, if
they do so then its best to support them by staying on their side and
supporting them to give their best on the upcoming days, rather than
showing a cruelty and blaming. Because of this habit, child hesitates to
share their experiences to their parents and by the time they know it
is already too late to stop the consequences.
If
we are friendly with the child and stay on their side encouraging for
the best, we can anticipate that what is going to happen, so that can
suggest them the way to not let this happen. It is always important to
maintain their independence, that is the developmental task for every
child and if they are not able to meet the needs can results delay in their development. It
is not necessary that child can understand right way at the time we
suggest. They need time to understand and think about this, so it is
better to explain them clearly about both positive and negative scenario
of the situation. Let them choose the way and appreciate whatever
they choose. If they choose the best way that is marvelous, give some
rewards for their good choices. It’s okay if they mislead the path, just
remain with them and warn them in between. After doing that also they
chose the way which they should not follow, allow them to come back to
you instead of scolding for not obeying them. Be with them every time
when they need and again help them to stand on their own like they
did in childhood. Our job being a parent is just to stay on the side
encouraging and supporting them to step up again.
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